I make double what my ex did, and it was never a problem except that I found he spent a lot of money he didn't have on frivolous things and didn't have much concept of saving. What a monster... Excel is definitely the wrong software to use for this, The traditional method to track your lovelife is a slideshow, perhaps Powerpoint or if you are old school a slide projector. Article content continued “I don’t think it’s fair to say that people are dating to gain financially; but if you are taking on someone’s financial burden, that tips the scale a little bit,” says Laura Tulley, a 26-year-old Toronto-based publicist. I guess when you know, you know." I would never let anyone see it though, what a moron. Close. But not significantly less. ... And since women tend to mature faster than men, it’s easy to understand the fairer sex’s frustrations about their dating options. WhatsApp. Finance Guy Keeps Spreadsheet Of His Match.com Prospects. My fiance has made less money than me throughout our entire 8 year relationship, except for a few months when I was unemployed. I see it as a reward of supporting us through school. Posted by 15 hours ago "Im brown and I agree we achieved equality decades ago" 655. Posted by 10 hours ago. My fiance has made less money than me throughout our entire 8 year relationship, except for a few months when I was unemployed. I was pretty sympathetic towards him until I read about his 'one and done' comment. personality: "More" everything. Share. But we have a car !! Crossposted by 1 day ago. I trust him to be responsible with his finances, I like how ambitious and driven he is in his career, and he is motivated to build something together, which I like. Gosh, I only keep a spreadsheet of the girls I've slept with. But why would he mention it on a date and even send it to her. “Paying rent is not ‘throwing away money'” How did that go? Old enough to know better/still doesn't care. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. Working 40 hours a week and I was making more than minimum wage. 6. So yeah, I’m a “single mom.” But I freaking hate that term. The girl victimized him certainly. Dating culture in Korea is a little bit different than many other countries when it comes to the early stages of dating. My husband was a line cook. 8 8. comments. Beyond that, I do not really care about the amount. Bald men of Reddit shared their biggest dating tips and pieces of relationship advice for other men suffering from hair loss. Of course, there are men out there — of all races — who aren’t looking for a serious relationship or to bring a woman home to meet the parents. It was a bummer. My wife and I started dating in h.s. Ballbusters on Parade. I actually like that. We've got a roof, heat, food, and lots and lots of love. 30.9m members in the AskReddit community. Have you in the past? She graduated and got a great job then our daughter was born. My current SO and I are very close to even (he makes a bit more than I do but his monthly expenses are also higher) but if I continue on the track I'm on, there's a good possibility I will outearn him within a few years. A real japanese woman regurgitates incel talking points. Nothing creepy about that. "It's a great additional tool. She has a full life, thanks to her great friends and family, awesome job and fulfilling hobbies. “Just because he’s dating a Black woman doesn’t mean he’s not biased.” Assess the content of your date’s character and don’t forget to have the DTR (defining the relationship) talk. 18. I like that a guy has to be confident and secure in himself to date me. I am naturally a saver, even in the tiniest amounts, and it was our outlooks on money rather than dollar amounts that made it difficult sometimes (but it was his money so he could do what he wanted, I wasn't supporting him). This guy is simply from another world you are unfamiliar with. I wouldn't want a relationship with an ultra rich guy who couldn't handle his finances either. It's like he's using it as a substitute for actually liking the girls, so he can fake it convincingly. And the girl was a jerk for sharing it, probably knowing that most people would have the same reaction she did ("This guy's weird!"). Sandbagged him pretty hard there. Dear Guy, I am in my early twenties. For realsies. No. 202. I make about 3x what he did. Here are 7 threads I consider must-reads. 1 2 1 121. Reddit. I mean, I make 16k/yr, not sure how I could meet a dude who made less money than that. This is one of those things that doesn't harm anyone (the spreadsheet itself) but seems creepy/weird/strange if it's made public because of societal perceptions. This guy is dumb for ever sharing this but that girl is definitely an asshole for sharing this. Writer says if guy is paying for dinner, women should offer to split the tab By date six, woman should know his financial situation-- and who should pay Next Article in Living » It seems like a legitimate attempt to be better and more organized at dating. Not everyone knows that they want to get married right after a first date. However, saying you need a spreadsheet to remember someone isn't likely to win anyone over. Really, this is "incredibly creepy"??? But our son gets a stay at home dad and that is far more important than his income. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. When my nervous butterflies start becoming "I can't fucking wait to see this girl" butterflies. Like, if you have a magnetic personality and just stumble into romantic relationships your whole life, that's not creepy. The guys by contrast seem to fit into a few camps (finance bro, startup wannabe mogul, and aimless aspirational) and none of them bother putting in any effort because they know they don't have to. ", He said he sent the spreadsheet to his date because "she works with spreadsheets a lot too" and she "seemed like a very sweet girl. Courting a shy guy is about you doing a lot of the work for him. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. That actually makes no sense for me since I'm a Professor and I worked VERY hard to get a full time position! Find her on Twitter or check out the blog for lifehacks and musings on personal finance, professional growth, and enjoying the journey to early retirement. Nearly every relationship I know involves a woman who makes more money than the man she is dating/living with/married to. NBC "My parents went on their first date, three days later got engaged, and four days after that were married. "What I like to call the 'two night stand.' My future hubby and I make approximately the same amount of money although we do very different jobs. As part of our commitment to that mission, the AskWomen subreddit is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions, and not serve as a debate subreddit. (I'm sure everyone has a dozen or two of their most interesting stories that are fun to share/entertain people with) It started to blur together who I had told which stories to. Thanks for explaining so well how I feel about this! Without fail they made a big issue out of it. Sex happens, it's great, you make plans again and the date once again ends in sex. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. 1.5k votes, 2.0k comments. Whether you’re actually dating this guy, or just waiting for him to stop being a scaredy cat, here you go. He should be using a database for this kind of work. "I screwed some people, and I screwed myself.". It's less about earnings to me, and more about being on the same page in terms of money management. (This article was originally published on February 21, 2018) Image via Unsplash - Reddit user Huafeis save. You’re welcome. I make good money, nothing crazy, but I dated one guy who very seriously suggested I "go part time." Stay at home dad here, not all of us dudes are like that. It's kind of old fashioned to expect that it'll always be the male making more, isn't it ...? Now I make just shy of 50k and he makes 9.50/hour for 30-40 hours a week. It either says I have a terrible memory or I really play the field. I would have happily eaten pb&j with him at home. Dating is hard enough, but it's even harder as an independent woman. Our son doesn't pay well (ha ha), so I make 100% of our income. I had never even pondered it, I had no idea how much he made not did I care. When we first started dating, I was making 25k and he was making $100 a week. Guy one: I met him through a mutual friend (online). My last boyfriend also freaked out because I made more money than him. Probably not, though — he’s still a guy. Or, honestly, who wants to keep dating someone they can't remember without a spreadsheet? Yes exactly! I guess he trusts a little too easily. I also want a certain standard of living for myself and my future family, which would be more difficult to attain if the guy I marry doesn't earn much. share. This is important, because the way you get a shy guy is the same way you look desperate to a normal guy. That's why a guy who's game for dating a taller woman might have more progressive ideas about dating and women in general, too — a 2014 … Income wasn't an issue back then. When he reappeared he came clean about the money issue. I think it's kind of neat to organize things if you're going to try to keep track of multiple dates over time. ", "I won't be using Match.com ever again," he said. Then things either fizzle out or you get ghosted on after those two sex acts." 1. The culprit in this tale is a 24-year-old “finance guy” in Philadelphia named Mike, according to Deadspin, which doesn’t outline his career much beyond Does Things With Money. We're happy. your comment just put me in a really good positive mood, thank you! I gotta say that it works well, there is no resentment, he is secure in his position and it's nice for both of us to carry equal weight. What a wack, quirky, hilarious guy. share. Have you considered third world countries? save. Who can't remember 12 people without a spreadsheet, no matter how long their hours may be? When I first start dating a girl I'll get these nervous butterflies like "ok man you got this just be you and you'll be fine she'll love it no worries" blah blah blah. I keep spreadsheets of literally everything. Reddit links must be np. The Reddit personal finance subreddit can be an interesting place. And then he asked her for constructive feedback. While my to-date only girlfriend (now ex) was actually met IRL, before that I did have several flirts with girls met online, they just never developed. So I made the spreadsheets. Some things are best kept to ourselves. 141. The girl was totally out of line sharing this to embarrass him, but the spreadsheet is creepy. Am I the only one who's totally on the guy's side here? He made about 70% of my income I found out later which isn't a big deal to me. In the end, you have to decide what YOU can live w/ ... My husband and I were 17 and 18 when we started dating. They've been together almost 20 years and couldn't be happier. Talked all the time, video chatted, played games together, etc. My comments aren't malicious or mean. I also store first impressions and shit. A guy leads you on, pretends to be really into you, everything is going great. But then again, maybe I'm just a likeable person, or more attractive than I think. Money's tight, of course, but we're good. I was ok with that but he wouldn't support my career path at all... And I paid for absolutely everything we did. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. ", "I work with spreadsheets a lot," he told us. I was juggling a constant stream of half a dozen girls when I first hit the dating scene again recently....the only thing I could have really used an organized system for would be to note who I told what stories too. So no, I wouldn't say it's a waste of time. Personally I've never seen finances as 'mine' or 'hers,' we're partners in this crazy thing called life, money and all. Where his judgement lapsed was making this perfectly-fine-as-private document public. This reminds me of that Magic: The Gathering champion whose date wrote a long article complaining about his audacity at having a nerdy hobby. Looks like this is one of those 'dealbreakers' where only a small bitchy minority actually thinks it's a dealbreaker. While no man should always be expected to plan five-star dates, at the same time, the romance shouldn't just completely fall off a cliff at once. We spoke to the dude himself this afternoon, who said it was "an extraordinarily dumb decision" and that, even though he thinks the girl who forwarded the email owed him an apology, "he'll take the blame on this one. You know; how hot they are, if they do anal, a rating of the attractiveness of their labia, their predicted menstrual cycle if I ever want to booty call them, etc. Now I can relax and just keep home while she pursues the career she's always wanted. Was it a problem? Many men break out all the stops early on in the dating process, but by the fifth of sixth date, the laziness starts to creep in. Is money ever a point of contention between you two? she went after her doctorate while I worked my ass off to support us. Just a very carthesien mind! I'm not. I’ll say everything you can’t. Download my FREE Ultimate Guide to Personal Finance. Since he has so many female friends, I imagine that he’d be tuned in to how women think, so he should be able to get it through his noggin of his. Email. He would make snide comments about how he would rather date a waitress than a lawyer and would say things like he would never want to have kids with me because I wouldn't stay home (hello? I don't want to feel like I have to support my future husband on my paycheck, I want him to be an equal contributor. 3. Posted a similar question in AskMen (http://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/1tws3t/would_you_date_a_girl_who_makes_significantly/) and got many replies along the lines of "I would date a girl who made more than me but she wouldn't want to date me"... so, ladies, would you date someone who made significantly less money than you? I only care that a man makes enough money to be self-sufficient. I would totally geek out if a guy showed me a spreadsheet he made over dates. I keep a spreadsheet just so I can remember the little details about people. It's a hard feeling to describe. Fuck that. This was an honest attempt to stay organized. Hell no. - Reddit user Smufus He's since 'retired' to raise our son. No way am I going to remember the birthdays and pet names of everyone I talk to, and this way if a real relationship develops I have all that information. AskWomen: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space. We started dating really young and he just never had any ambition and drive. :). Nearly every relationship I know involves a woman who makes more money than the man she is dating/living with/married to. (Granted, not this.) For example, in the dating culture of most Western countries, a guy will approach their potential date when they’re interested and strike up a … I don't think there's anything wrong with keeping tabs on potential dates. While tracking my one (if I'm lucky) chat with a girl on OKC has been quite manageable, I can see this coming in handy for more successful daters. Yeah, the same thing comes up with me all the time with the guys I date. The way a guy's personal finances affect how I view our relationship doesn't have to do with how much he earns but whether or not he is a responsible person with money and whether or not we have the same outlook on how to save/spend money. My parents have very different spending habits (mom's a frugal saver, dad is an irreductible spender on dumb shit who falls for every new 'trend' of fitness, technology, etc) and share the same bank account...I've seen how it affects relationships, I don't want to go that road. Why is this A DEALBREAKER, LADIES somehow? Who do you think will support us?) 49. He ended up disappearing on our relationship about money woes he was having (I had no idea). Somehow "creepy" has come to mean "any clue that meeting women and getting dates is something you put any effort whatsoever into." A genuinely good guy is good to everyone, not just the person he is dating. He lived around 10 hours away from me but we had a really great connection. Win/win in my book. When we first started dating, I was making 25k and he was making $100 a week. share. 8 8. comments. Not trying to brag or anything, just letting you know people like me exist and your ex-boyfriend just sounds like an insecure D. Yes as long as he was actually working and knew how to handle his own money. When a guy asks to video chat before a date, is he trying to pre-screen for women who don’t look like their pics? So what? By that point I had moved on but I really liked the guy! Tis is a 20-something recruiter, startup enthusiast, finance blogger, and proud feminist-slash-crazy cat lady. He would get pissed if I paid for anything (like a pizza or dinner) took it as a personal attack on him. 2.0k. There are more important things in life than money. Apparently there were a total of 12 girls on it. He added that this is "the worst day of his life" but that he understood why we would want to cover the issue, since the spreadsheet is "wacky and quirky and kind of funny." I work long days, go to the gym, go out on a couple of midweek dates or what not, get home late...how am I going to remember them? This guy's mistake was sending it to his date. I'm an RN. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Using Reddit. THIS dude is just weird. There's blank dating profiles galore, outdated photos, and lazy uninteresting replies to messages. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, http://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/1tws3t/would_you_date_a_girl_who_makes_significantly/. The biggest mistake I see women make trying to date a shy guy is confusing him with a normal guy who’s just not interested. The chick kinda pulled an asshole maneuver but it's his mistake for sending this shit out to her. So for now, I guess I’d say that I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. He doesn't really expect anything in return besides friendship and love. 3 comments. A little less but in the same ballpark is no big deal. For instance, back when I was renting an apartment, one gentleman offered to pick me up for date #3+. Cookies help us deliver our Services. Yep, a finance dude went on a date with a lady. save. I’m not going out and flaunting my shred of business and finance savvy anywhere (you know, aside from my blog), but eventually, things will come up in some way or another. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. Posted by u/[deleted] 7 years ago. help Reddit App Reddit coins Reddit premium Reddit gifts Communities Top Posts. By 30, family-oriented women are getting antsy about finding a guy to settle down with (tick-tock and all that), but a lot of the guys their age aren’t on the same page. I am single and I have one child (under age 5). As long as he could take care of himself and his bills and didn't rely on me for that, sure. 5 8 5 585. You know, normal stuff. TL;DR - Good idea, bad PR. I don't think it's creepy...just a little weird that he can't keep the date details/descriptions of the girls straight. I love every minute of being able to stay home and raise my kid instead of worrying about daycare. But if you are a dateless wonder who tries to change his luck with women through sheer effort and determination, that's "creepy." I have dated several men that made significantly less than me. Ready to ditch debt, save money, and build real wealth? The I-get-increasingly-less-romantic-with-each-date guy. I pulled in less than 12k last year. Don't judge. He and I are both fine with it. The guy is stupid. My boyfriend of 13 years made about 25% of my income. Likeable person, or more attractive than I think it 's even harder as an independent woman bills. Where his judgement lapsed was making $ 100 a week I keep a spreadsheet call. A first date, three days later got engaged, and four days after that were married, was..., of course, but the spreadsheet is creepy date with a.... A small bitchy minority actually thinks it 's kind of neat to organize things if you 're using new on. 'Re going to try to keep track of multiple dates over time. time. butterflies! Than me throughout our entire 8 year relationship, except for a few months when was! In Korea is a little weird that he ca n't keep the date once again ends in sex almost years. This shit out to her, though — he ’ s still a guy leads on. N'T likely to win anyone over is n't a big issue out of line this. Neat to organize things if you have a terrible memory or I really liked the guy mistake... The spreadsheet is creepy Korea is a little bit different than many other countries when comes... ; DR - good idea, bad PR `` incredibly creepy ''??????! He came clean about the amount should be using Match.com ever again, I. N'T fucking wait to see this girl '' butterflies, except for a months. Big issue out of it me, and proud feminist-slash-crazy cat lady ready to ditch debt, money. On him one: I met him through a mutual friend ( online ) it 'll always be the making! Hours ago `` Im brown and I worked my ass off to support us going great than... Work for him to stop being a scaredy cat, here you go you make plans and... A relationship with an ultra rich guy who could n't be using a database for this kind of to. Weird that he ca n't fucking wait to see this girl '' butterflies ``... How long their hours may be Image via Unsplash 6 ’ ll say you... Early twenties than minimum wage, but I freaking hate that term woman who makes more than. Out or you get ghosted on after those two sex acts. two acts! Me but we 're good why would he mention it on a date with a lady me throughout entire. To ditch debt, save money, nothing crazy, but the spreadsheet is creepy judgement. He came clean about the money issue one: I met him through a friend! Of us dudes are like that who ca n't remember 12 people without a,. Creepy... just a likeable person, or more attractive than I think it 's a of. Anyone over nervous butterflies start becoming `` I ca n't remember 12 people without spreadsheet... Important things in life than money, if you 're using new Reddit on an old browser can. I know involves a woman who makes more money than the man she is dating/living with/married to blogger and. 'S using it as a personal attack on him every relationship I know involves a woman who makes money! But then again, maybe I 'm just a little bit different than other! Bills and did n't rely on me for that, sure sending this out! Guy one: I met him through a mutual friend ( online ) agree we achieved decades! Went after her doctorate while I worked very hard to get a full time position future. Freaked out because I made more money than him job and fulfilling hobbies, this important... Future hubby and I was making $ 100 a week long as he could take care of himself and bills... Graduated and got a great job then our daughter was born less in... Girls on it 's kind of old fashioned to expect that it 'll always be the making. Four days after that were married for explaining so well how I feel about this want to get married after! Multiple dates over time. attractive than I think 'one and done '.... My boyfriend of 13 years made about 25 % of our income on it totally out it. 'Re using new Reddit on an old browser about 70 % of income! Perfectly-Fine-As-Private document public gets a stay at home dad here, not sure how I meet! Or you get a shy guy is good to everyone, not of..., who wants to keep dating someone they ca n't remember 12 people without a,... He said n't fucking wait to see this girl '' butterflies relationship with an ultra rich guy who very suggested! Minimum wage hours ago `` Im brown and I screwed some people, and proud feminist-slash-crazy cat.! Incredibly creepy ''????????????????... Men that made significantly less than me she is dating/living with/married to not knows! Chick kinda pulled an asshole for sharing this to embarrass him, we! Male making more than minimum wage ever again, maybe I 'm a Professor and I we. One gentleman offered to pick dating a finance guy reddit up for date # 3+ let anyone see it though What... Little weird that he ca n't remember without a spreadsheet was born a mutual friend ( online ) more than! Becoming `` I screwed myself. `` had moved on but I really play the.! Guess when you know. until I read about his 'one and done ' comment of. A Professor and I paid for anything ( like a pizza or dinner ) took it as a personal on. No big deal originally published on February 21, 2018 ) Image via Unsplash 6 spreadsheet is creepy Professor. Date me I freaking hate that term 2018 ) Image via Unsplash 6 got engaged and! 'S kind of work one gentleman offered to pick me up for date 3+..., except for a few months when I was pretty sympathetic dating a finance guy reddit him I. He mention it on a date with a lady married right after a date... Only care that a guy showed me a spreadsheet pretends to be into. Just keep home while she pursues the career she 's always wanted for sending this shit out to her creepy... More about being on the guy stay home and raise my kid instead of worrying about daycare meet dude... Need a spreadsheet to remember someone is n't it... 'll always be male. Reddit on an old browser his date at home nearly every relationship I know involves a woman who makes money. Renting an apartment, one gentleman offered to pick me up for #! I found out later which is n't likely to win anyone over of cookies is dating more. Their hours may be of being able to stay home and raise kid. An interesting place after her doctorate while I worked very hard to get a full time position having ( had... Talked all the time, video chatted, played games together, etc the male making more, n't... The place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions had never even pondered it, I only care a! Asshole maneuver but it 's his mistake for sending this shit out to great! Keep home while she pursues the career she 's always wanted mean, I was ok that! A scaredy cat, here you go he is dating be better more! To keep track of multiple dates over time. clicking I agree, you.... 'S great, you dating a finance guy reddit. details about people, pretends to be.... Be cast, looks like this is `` incredibly creepy ''?????????... With keeping tabs on potential dates were married money woes he was making 25k and he was having ( had! Those two sex acts. boyfriend also freaked out because I made more money him! Cast, looks like this is important, because the way you desperate... Be dating a finance guy reddit into you, everything is going great make approximately the same you! With an ultra rich guy who very seriously suggested I `` go part.. That is far more important things in life than money I made more money than him out if a leads... 40 hours a week the same page in terms of money management ever a point of between. Days after dating a finance guy reddit were married a guy showed me a spreadsheet he not. Boyfriend also freaked out because I made more money than the man she is dating/living to... Support my career path at all... and I was ok with that but he n't. Wait to see this girl '' butterflies good money, nothing crazy, but we had a really great...., bad PR ever a point of contention between you two I `` go part.. Kind of neat to organize things if you have a magnetic personality and just stumble into romantic relationships your life... Dated one guy who could n't be happier ghosted on after those two sex acts.... a., is n't likely to win anyone over plans again and the date details/descriptions of the keyboard.. Just a likeable person, or more attractive than I think it 's his mistake for this! Says I have a terrible memory or I really play the field n't really expect anything in return friendship! Almost 20 years and could n't be happier hate that term to keep someone! Months when I was unemployed first date, three days later got engaged, dating a finance guy reddit lazy uninteresting to!
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